it is what it is.

But what I've learned about closure is that it's not necessary. If you don't get the closure you wanted from others then find that closure within yourself. - Thought Catalog

Mostly, we wait for closure before we take the next step even if we are in a situation that constantly makes us feel worse about our self. We hope that someone would just say it to our face and give us a solid b*tch slap so we can move on already.  

Move on from that job application that you've been wanting all your life. Move on from that car you can never buy. Move on from that weight you can only achieve if you die from hunger. Move on from your favorite celebrity couple who made you love them like your own offspring. Move on from that social status you will never get because you spend more than you earn. Move on from that kind of friendship that was as fake as her eyelashes. Move on from that jerk who said he wanted you but he was just bored that’s all. Etc etc etc etc.

Closure is like signs. We look for signs to affirm our planned decision. And let's be real here - one of the hardest decisions would be to either give up or keep chasing pavements (yes, that's Tita Adele right there).

We can wait, sure. But waiting means taking that leap of faith as well. Life doesn't stop while we wait. That's not how life works. Life's a game - an unfair game as we call it. But we continue to strive more while we wait for our turn. And when that time comes, that’s like that cold beer you’ve been dreaming on a summer day or that hot chocolate on a winter morning.   

As we all end 2019 soon, let it serve as a closure to everything that we've been frustratingly waiting to happen. Because sometimes the longer we wait for closure, we tend to ignore the fact that it is what it is.

khalas!

Keep Calm and Carry On!

The thing about writing something and posting it online is that you can go back and read tf your mind worked that time lol.

There’s so much to reflect about this year but what’s significant is that 2019 had me embrace change more than I could ever imagine.

“During your transformation, you might feel like everything is falling apart, but in reality, everything is coming together for your highest good. You’re being pushed to evolve and get out of your comfort zone so you can live and experience your true greatness. Welcome change.” - Anonymous

Every chance I get, I would look back to last year and the year before that. Not to emote or something but I look back to those times when I was too broken while I hold on to that very weak string about to give up because of depression. When I reached the rock bottom but I managed to pull up and be glad that I made it back to being whole again. When something like that happens to you, when you feel like you’re struggling to get out from a black hole or you feel like everything's going against you, look for change because change will save you from it. Well ok, I’m not sure if it applies to everyone but it definitely worked for me. Fortunately, change came this year. Because of what I endured, I felt like I’m a totally different person with a bunch of lessons learned from last time. New perspective and I definitely know the subtle way of not giving a f anymore (except when I’m on PMS).

The decision I made of leaving PHL to work abroad for longer term was a big step. Those people who think that overseas work-life is alright, wait until you experience it yourself. You guys think that you know, but you have no idea.

My situation is somewhat better because of some perks but what’s different is that, in less than a year, I’ve moved to 2 countries already and moving from one to another is not easy! Just when you thought that everything’s like home already, you realize that it’s time to get your sh*t together because you need to pack your life again and move. You again start from scratch; you play by your own judgement – trusting your instincts. Someone told me that it seemed that I adjust easily but dude it’s not even close. I struggle too but I always find ways to be relieved. The thing about moving, it’s like you’re not allowed to get too attached to something and someone because you will have to leave (again) soon. And that’s terrible but I guess I need to learn how to deal with it. So yeah, whatever.

Nevertheless, I’m grateful for everything and for all the fond memories from this year. Thank you, Lord for 2019. I’m thankful especially to the people who have touched and changed my life forever. My shenanigans and stupid whatnots. Those temporary emotions lol.

I don’t know what the future holds but I’m definitely excited for 2020.  So, cheers to positivity... Keep calm and carry on!